Get thee to a cannery
Alright, if you are intimidated by my coolness, then you need to stop reading right now. This post may just wreck what little self esteem you have left. Kids, don’t try this at home; you have to be born this cool:
Who is that fine woman?
That’s right, it’s time for a trip to the cannery! Some of you may not be hip to the lingo, but the cannery is where all the groovy Mormons go to put all their wheat into cans. Lest you think we’re all cliquish, you don’t actually have to be mormon to go. Anyone is welcome, and it’s a rockin’ good time! Also, the cannery isn’t just for wheat anymore! There’s also dried milk, dried carrots, dried apples, dried refried beans, and the ever popular potato pearls!
Shake, not bang!
Now that I’m the official organizer for trips to the cannery, I’m taking the Tom Sawyer approach. If people think it’s fun and they think you’re fun then they’ll want to come. Case in point, getting CoKim and Ami to come. Once people knew they were coming then we were turning people away! CoKim is so cool she insisted upon right of first refusal for her picture, so I can’t even show her face, but that’s her on the left!
CoKim and Ami
In case you’ve never been to a cannery before(some people are intimidated by the velvet ropes), I’m going to break it down for you. First, you make an appointment (just like you do with your personal shopper at Nordstrom), then, you call in your order (you can also fax or e-mail … this is the 21st century), then you show up with a group of 5-12 people. Once you arrive, after washing hands and putting on the plastic apron and hair net, you get in a little assembly line. First, bags are emptied into cans, then cans are topped off, then they are leveled by shaking, not banging on the counter. The next person in line then adds the oxygen packet and the lid, and then the coolest person in the room gets to turn the crank on the canning machine. Once it’s canned it moves on down the line to the people filling the boxes with the orders. Then, when all of the orders are filled there’s a quick clean-up and a trip through the checkout, which is really just the office. Total time at the cannery: 1 hour. They’re open all different hours, so if you’re looking for an original date night, don’t underestimate the power of the cannery. Peace out!
Hip to be square!
